Christmas Crafts and Dumpster Diving

Well, some people may be disappointed to read this, and some will be thrilled to read this, and some, well, they just won't care, but Crafting Christmas has kicked off again, and since the task every year is to out-do and under-spend everyone else I have turned to bargain-hunting, dumpster-diving, and of course chemistry.

Just to quell the germophobes, no I am not giving away the dumpster finds (they were far too good-and people are weird about that). People will seriously throw out perfectly good stuff. The nameless pharmacy down the street had thrown out enough halloween candy from this year to I got 6 bags of name brand above average dark chocolate, retailing about $5 a bag for 5 minutes of opening giant plastic bags, amongst the hundreds of bags of good halloween candy (M&Ms, Reese's, Snickers, Twix, Starbursts... yeah hundreds of bags just tossed, not even sold at clearance, just discarded.) Makes me wonder what else they chuck. After flu season will it be Airborne and Mucinex, after tax time will we find antacids and Aleve? Where do stores get off throwing out perfectly unharmed items, undamaged, unopened, unexpired? In a time when "green" is the big push, why do they have the right to overstock and discard? The garbage company certainly won't care, as long as stores keep buying service plans for huge dumpsters.

This is a digression. Christmas Crafts have begun. Last year's end of "Christmas Returns Week" got me bags and presents galore for $20. All said and done, I had 18 people done for $19.50. That's roughly $1 a person, well, if Freedom costs a buck o five, then Christmas can cost a buck o eight. So, having half done Christmas 360 days early, its time to knock off the other half, and then the biggy's: the fam. The Dad-who-just-buys-what-he-wants-so-there's-never-an-opportunity-to-buy-him-anything; the I-don't-really-want-anything-Mom; the sister with expensive taste; the brother into hazardous substances and barely legal hobbies. Good thing everyone is into food. Surprisingly the winning-est gift last year (and yes its a contest, the winning-est gift is the cheapest but most enthusiastically received gift, it has to be a two-fer) was the crate of 4 gallons of Arizona iced tea purchased at Price Right for the brother. Take a small obsession, totally overdo it in quantity, buy from a wholesaler, and bam! instant win.

Bargain Eats in New Haven: Back to Howe St for Mamoun's

The Lowdown:
Not sure how to start this, how about:
GO THERE! Even if you're not hungry.
Seriously put down the mouse, log off the computer, and get to 85 Howe St (near where it crosses Edgewood) and have frugal food experience much better than reading about it.
If you're still here:
Its busy, its small, its cheap, its fast, its good.
Open 11am-3am apparently 365 days a year, they deserve props for dedication.
Way to give McDonald's a run for their money!
Go here instead when you need fast-filling-cheap. Greasy, meaty, or healthy... its on the menu here for $2-$5 and puts most other food to shame, no to mention what "garbage arches" serves. They also have simple desserts, including baklava, and turkish delight.

Many things are vegetarian, vegans can't eat the pitas, only since pitas generally are non-vegan, but "plates" are larger portions on a salad for $5-$8.
Lastly, gotta respect a place that puts fresh parsley in the pitas. (dark green splotch on tomato)
Who does that? no one. Who loves it? everyone!

I watched the guy make my pitas, and discovered where I have been going wrong all these years, don't cut the pita in half, cut off the top 3/4 inch. Yes, its a sacrifice, but then the pita holds a ton of food without breaking at the edge. Brilliant! The sandwiches were crazy good. Having left my camera in my car, I got a falafel pita, a hummus pita, and a tea to go. I got to my car, and was so excited to try it I forgot to photograph the first sandwich right away. Carried away by deliciousness, I got mostly through it before I remembered to stop to inhale, and photograph. The last bite can be seenabove, hey, at least there is some falafel in it!

The Review:
falafel sandwich ($3.50):
MMMMM:crunchy and warm and a little greasy, but just a little. With the pita salad conglomeration of lettuce, tomato, red onion, and fresh parsley and topped with tahini sauce. I can tell already this is a food I will crave, and pine for when I leave New Haven in November. It is now a weekly staple.

hummus sandwich ($3.00):
MMMM:Hummus was very garlicky (just the way I like it) killer top notes of fresh parsley, crispy crunchy biting red onions, lots of lettuce & tomatoes, and smooth garlicky hummus overflowing from a pita. A very refreshing sandwich.

The tea was even good. I asked the guy what it was like, black tea or spiced chai, he said, "Well its middle-eastern tea." I tried it, and liked it. It was like black tea with cardamom, reminiscent of chai, but definitely not as spicy, and of course no milk, pepper or sugar.


The Bottom Line: for $8, 2 large sandwiches, each a normal meal's worth and tea. By my math, a large great sandwich and tea, $4.50. Seems a little over the top having two 5M'ers in a row, but trust me, but for the falafel, it is warranted, and is perfect for foodies on a budget.
Next time: falafel again, a souvenir T-shirt for $5, and something kabob'ed!

For more info, a menu and to check out the NY location http://www.mamounsfalafel.com/

Bargain Eats In New Haven: The Search for Sushi.

The Search:
Looking for Miya's Sushi on Howe St in New Haven.
It took a while what with the streets in the middle of downtown closed, but I eventually found a place to park, on the corner of Howe and Elm. Getting out of my car I smelled something delicious! I knew I wasn't close enough for it to be Miya's, and I was on a mission, but I took a look around for further investigation. I saw: Pizza at the Brick Oven, Rudy's, and 2 other places that evade memory. Google maps says one is alpha delta pizza. I make a mental note to come back here, and at least try a slice at brick oven.

I get directions from a local, walk down Howe St, passed a felafel house (Mouman's?) that smells like heaven on earth, and a dark garden cafe called the Kasbah (rock the kasbah?), both also worthy of a trip later.

In an unassuming simple brick building, with little sign-age, I almost walked right past it.
A waiter greets me, as I am sure I look confused, seats me at the bar, and I dive into a daunting menu. It is long and thorough, explaining many items as an excerpt from the chef's life.
I skim, and get distracted, besides, I already know what I want: The Late Night Sushi Giveaway Special.

Unsure of how it works (the menu says by reservation only, but I hear everyone ordering it), I ask. Friendly waiter assures me I can get one, two, however many I want.

The Lowdown:
Order a platter, get 5 or 6 pieces of the interesting rolls they have.
It is a random sampler of their sushi rolls.
Yes, it includes the expensive ones.
No, you can't specify particulars, except vegan. I told friendly waiter I was allergic to blue cheese, he said to not worry.
It costs $4.75 a platter.
Beer pitchers are also 1/3 off.
It runs for limited times on Friday and Saturday night.
Miya's website has the exact times, there is a link at the bottom.

As it is not a night for drinking a pitcher alone, I order a special platter and a spicy tillapia roll, and some green tea. I have done my best to write down, remember, and look up the rolls I had. I ate the samplers without soy sauce or wasabi, to fully experience. Having a bite of spicy tillapia in between each of the new and interesting rolls provided a familiar sweet and spicy cleanse, and satisfied my craving for spice - I let them soak in a mixture of soy sauce and wasabi cut with green tea. Also, all the "sampler" roll pieces were the big ones which I always wonder how I manage to get them in my mouth.

The Rating System: say the 'm' sound for 1 second per 'M', except 2 which sounds like "M-M".
M: not so good, a warning to others not to try.
MM:okay, skeptical of trying again, try at your own risk.
MMM: good. glad I tried it, likely to try again.
MMMM:very good. Definitely having again.
MMMMM:so good I must have again, and will go out of my way to do so. Very few things get this rating, Mom's apple pie sets this standard (and she won an award for it).

The Real Review:
spicy tilapia roll:
MMMM:whole tillapia, not chopped which gives fleshy-velvety texture, red spicy sauce. Sweet fish, spicy stuff, perfect rice. Great.

chinese pygmy rodeo roll:
MMMM: potatoey, dry crunch, cauliflower is not overpowering, fresh dill gives it spunk.

foo man choo roll:
MMM: only if you love asparagus. I like, not love. It would have been better with some spice, next time, I'm adding horseradish or wasabi to bump it to 4 M's.

kinoko roll:
MMMMM: The best one I had, subtle and understated. Mushroomy and creamy, excellent. Craving it with green tea right now, (I don't even like japanese mushrooms!) and best of all, not too pricey on a non-giveaway day at $9 for 6 large pieces.

mighty mother earth roll:
MMMM: Interesting combinations of texture- crunchy shrimp tempura, fleshy salmon, salty bursts from caviar, crisp asparagus and scallions, sweet smooth creamy mascarpone blends everything together beautifully.

ride the wild donkey roll:
MMMM: Fruity, creamy, soft, wheat-y, crunchy. It is confusingly delicious. The apricot makes it. I hope to get it in a sampler again, but almost $20, I will try new ones before I settle on buying it outright.

The Bottom Line: $9.01 plus tip for a unique and decent late night dinner, complete with tea satisfaction and surprises. Not for the unadventurous, or closed minded. There was something I wouldn't try on my own, something I didn't like, something I wished they had, (a crunchy spicy tuna roll), and something I loved despite thinking I would not. Next time I go there, I am getting 2 samplers without a tillapia roll safety net.
Looking forward to tribute to Native Americans' foods-roll "coming soon."

Descriptions and prices can be found at: http://www.miyassushi.com/menu.html

Mosquito Repellent Experiment Installment 2

Is garlic an effective mosquito repellent? The short answer, "hells no!"
The long answer is, of course, a bit more complicated. If you read the first installment, you might have recalled I am the lifeblood of mosquitoes. They travel across miles of country to taste my blood. So, I figure if garlic works for me, it works for everyone. But, by the tools of logic, I deduce that if it doesn't work for me, it might still work for humans that are less than magically-delicious.

The hypothesis: Garlic is a mild mosquito repellent.
The experiment:A very tasty human will eat loads of garlic, allow 5 hours for digestive processing, and venture outside for 30 minutes.
For breakfast: a garlic bagel, 3 cloves of roasted garlic, 3 garlic pickles, garlic chive cream cheese
For lunch: and toast with roasted garlic spread on it like butter, more garlic pickles, another clove for good measure.
For snack just prior to outing: a small slice of margherita pizza smeared with minced garlic.
The family notices, and appropriately mocks her. Time to go outside. With stinky skin and breath, another 30 minutes in the mosquito habitat.

The result: 11 mosquito bites. At least 7 mosquitos died during this experiment. (This is about normal. Also, I tried really hard not to kill any, to preserve the sanctity of science, but instinct takes over, and I become a crazed mosquito death machine.)
The conclusion: Garlic may be a mild deterrent. Further testing necessary.

Takin' it up a notch, a la mythbusters: Allowed for mosquitos to get back to normal, as in to stop being frenzied by my presence, for about an hour.
The variable: With no one home to mock me, I feel free to indulge and go all out, my left arm and leg get spread with minced garlic and some garlic pickle brine. I then brush off the bits, cuz they feel weird. Even my garlic bombarded nose is offended by my left side.
The control: The right side gets the same treatment with a 15% DEET spray.
We know 40% DEET is a very effective repellent. 15% should also repel, but likely in less degree. Maybe some skin will remain unbitten. I left the central areas untreated. Smelling like a zombie, trudged back to the garden, but being out of "gardening" I just read a book and killed mosquitos for 30 minutes in the garden.

The results: 6 dead mosquitos.
The garlic side:4 new bites (since it is less than half the "testing" area, this works out to the same average # of bites per square inch of skin as just eating garlic.
The DEET side: 2 new bites, and watched a reluctant hoverer go for it and try to bit my forearm. He met his death.

So, since each of these new results is only on about 40% of the area as the first 2 tests, the garlic spread side had about the same # of bites per area as just eating garlic, and more than using 40% DEET. The 15% DEET side had obviously fewer than the garlic spread side, more than just eating garlic, and more than 40% DEET.

Conclusions:DEET works better in higher concentrations, but garlic does not provide an appreciable deterrent to mosquitos.

I may be sueded to retry in the interest of science, ya know repeatability and standard deviation and all that jazz, but as I like my skin, I will have to think about it, and at very least let it heal a bit. However, if anyone wants to be a subject, I would love to hear your results.

Next time I'd like to try catnip, as rumors suggest its better than DEET, but I need to find some first.

SWL 2

The library closes at 12:00am.
They announce this at 11:30pm, 11:45pm, and 11:55pm.
Students know it closes.
If someone, like say a grad student has been scurrying for the last hour, and prints at 11:56pm, they should be able to get that document.
11:55pm last announcement.
11:55 pm The student librarian (which is a good idea only in theory) who talked to his friends loudly for the 4 hours you have been there typing and printng, typing and printing, turns off the printer and computer hooked up to it unbenownced to you.
11:55pm you finish the last document you need for you 7:00am class, and print it.
Walk over to computer to scan your ID to get you document, and the computer is off.
At 11:57pm you bring it to the attention of the student librarian, amicably.
The response is "Well, I turned it off." (he should be in MENSA) and looks at you like you are asking for his first born child. You proceed to explain that you could not have possibly worked any faster, gotten here any earlier, and need that document for class at 7:00am, about 2 hours before the library even opens tomorrow, and still, only the look.

11:59pm the circulation librarian steps in, (thank God) You proceed to explain AGAIN about 4 hours, going fast, and needing the document for class at 7:00am, before the library even opens tomorrow, and NOW the response is, "Maam, its past 12:00."

Well, of course it is NOW that you have been arguing with the student librarian and now you for at least 5 minutes. The librarians are now gathering around me in a circle, waiting. So, you explained AGAIN. The response was "they (as in the vague and ominous they) want us out the door at 12."

If the student librarian had waited, you could have been printed, logged off and been out the door before 12:00am.

If he had turned it on at 11:57pm, let it boot, let you reprint it, you could be walking out the door right now, at 12:05am.

But no, now its 12:05am, and your only defense is "they want us out the door at 12." (Well, that is shot now anyway.) So, you reiterate, "I need that document to teach a class tomorrow at 7:00 am. I could not have gone any faster, I only finished it at 11:55pm. I have been here for 4 hours working very fast, and the student guy turned the printer off early."

Just looks, verbal response seems unlikely. you look back, incredulously. Still no verbal response. Did they hear you? You follow up your statement with a "So.....?" nothing.
You follow up the nothing with a "So, you're not going to let me print?"
and still "well, they want us out at 12."

Okay, fine, but you are taking your sweet time packing up, probably about as long as it would take a high speed printer to print 101 pages. Then "safely removing" your flashdrive. Then logging off. Then staring down anyone left in the room. Then asking for the name of the head librarian. Guess what he's getting? Oh, and the president gets another one.

What do you do about the class? Who knows? see if theres a Fedex kinkos that does 24 hours?
That or be unprepared for class... way to go library, you've done it again.

Strongly worded letters...

Well when people at an organization or an institution really irk me, I find the best form of therapy is a screaming at the top of my lungs in the car where everyone can see, but no one can hear, and everyone thinks you're a crazy NY driver anyway, and to follow-up with a very cold, calculating, sphincter-snapping, strongly worded letter addressed to one or more of the heads of the department, organization, business, and the like. I also find that strongly worded letters tend to get responses, which is very empowering, and though probably bad for the world in the long run because it reinforces my ego into thinking that, yes I am in fact God. However, it might save some little people who stumble upon the organization of offense after me from trouble, and isn't that what divinity is really about? Fits of rageful vengeance followed by a strategic attack on evil to save the people from suffering what you have already burdened? That's right... god.

The events that led to the tirade above on SWL's were these:
Upon having to register by hand, as if the Bronze age were once again upon us, I drove across campus (it was raining) to the graduate department (no longer called the registrar because well, no one ever has to see a registrar in the digital age...except me.) they were actually extremely nice and helpful. Getting to see them, a soul-sucking adventure.

Imagine a 4-way cross shaped 90 degree intersection. Imagine now you, the cars to the right,and the cars across from you all have stop signs. The cars on the left have an unencumbered drive. You have to go straight, onto a very narrow road that could just fit 2 cars abreast if they were small and driven carefully. This road is NOT a one way road. This road is also filled with cars facing you, as far as you can see. Those cars are in the middle of the narrow road. There's no getting down that road. The cars on the left just keep passing through. The cars across and on the right vie for position to go towards your left, there are lines of cars behind all 3 of you, all irate. You can SEE the parking lot for the registrar. It's maybe 25 feet, maybe. Surrounded by a curb and cars in spaces. If only you owned a monster truck, or a canyonero (see Well Read Mom for clarification). Its the only way in... extremely frustrating. So what do you do? you go Left, after waiting for an opportunity when the cars that don't have to stop are gone. Swerve around the guy trying to take your spot cuz he's been siting at the stop sign so long he doesn't care whose turn it is, drive back onto campus, and walk to the registrar in the rain.

You ask the registrar people what is with the road and the parking lot, and they say a small private high school gets out, and forces parents picking up their children to all leave the school that way, implying it is a one way road, when it is in fact, not. This happens twice a day, everyday, at opening and closing of the school.
So who got a SWL? Well, who didn't? Were you spared? cuz I could send you one. The college president, the private high school principal and headmaster and the city in which they both reside.

Mosquito Reppellent Experiments Installment 1

I hate mosquitoes, but they love me. My blood must send out signals "filet mignon with shallots… over here!". I say this having many a time experienced walking with family or friends who return home unbitten, and I am covered in red bites, even wearing bug spray. Those insidious mosquitoes will defy poison to bit me even when non-poisoned humans are right next to me! I need to level the playing field. I need to be brought down to “fast-food-hamburger” status. Here’s the idea: try out every option I can find until something that isn’t horribly disfiguring works.

The fist candidate: Cutter 40% DEET lotion. I call it Superdeath. I bought a tube for $6.

Pros: works pretty good. It is a lotion, brilliant! It stays on a long time.

Cons: well, its 40% DEET which even wikipedia says it inhibits the central nervous system of mammals, thanks, Cutter, but when I want to inhibit my brain, I use ethanol.
Also, $6 a tube! A big tube, but still… c’mon!
It stays on a long time: after hours outside, a swim, a shower, a night of sleep I could still smell it on my skin.

Conclusion: With great power comes great responsibility. Not for everyday use, but definitely for hiking or camping, or yardwork in a swamp.
The second candidate: homeopathic, and tasty… Garlic!